
Hear ye. Hear ye. You folks out there, remember the name … Jodl Gayatin. I shall forever be known in the field of astronomy.
Celestial navigators shall refer to me in their lifelong quest.
Star struck poets (not the Dream Believe Survive kind of crap) shall have mouthful froth upon hearing my name.
Amateur astronomers shall glorify me in astronomy books for generations and generations to come.
Ok lower down those eyebrows. (You too Ria T.!) What amazing feat, you ask, have I done to earn such prestige?
Have I discovered a heretofore-unknown planet? Nope discoveries of heavenly bodies ain’t my cup of tea.
Have I proven the presence of a black hole in nearby regions of the solar system? Not quite…although I once did suspect its existence somewhere between the ears of a former boss.
Have I derived the great equation for the Theory of Everything thereby unifying the four forces of the universe? The much-sought equation that has eluded Einstein. That one single beeeeautiful equation that holds true in the beginning and at the end of time. The Holy Grail of Physics. An awesome far-reaching formula that encompasses Newton’s Laws, Relativity and Quantum Mechanics. A mathematical derivation, Ockham’s-razor in its simplicity yet brilliantly elegant; eternal and enduring be it at the heart of Big Bang or at the fringes of the Event Horizon. (okay if you’ve reached this part without having brain hemorrhage, nay on the contrary even groaning in ecstasy…. my advice…you’re spending too much in the theoretical subatomic world - grab a beer and get a life !) (how dare this schmuck tell me to fix my life when he spends his free time croaking sappy songs and scribbling senseless blog stuff)
No folks… None of the above.
I, a few years and heartaches back, once came up with a mnemonic device. ( Mnemonic devices– you know stuff like “Every Good Boy Does Fine” in Music or the “Bad Boys Rape Our Young Girls But Violy Gave in Willingly.. in Electrical Engg)
I was a college student then who joined the great UP Astronomical Society for a profoundly compelling reason - my ravishing classmate was also applying. Oh the ironies of life, she never finished the application and I eventually got stuck with a bunch of stiff-necked, bespectacled, geeky folks (who are nonetheless adorable, cute and exciting – I know you guys are going to read this, so there!)
Anyway, Astronomy 101 – the zodiacal constellations in sequence are ARIES, TAURUS, GEMINI, CANCER, LEO, VIRGO, LIBRA, SCORPIO, SAGITTARIUS, CAPRICORN, AQUARIUS and PISCES. (By the way, ASTRONOMY is different from ASTROLOGY, the former is science the latter is a pseudo science bullsh*t) It’s kinda hard memorizing the sequence so I came up with a Mnemonic Device. One that is simple and star-studded…
“According To Gabby Concepcion Laging Very Loving Si Sharon Cuneta After Performance.”
Lo and behold. Several years and star gazing sessions after, amateur astronomers are using my mnemonic device. Yeba! Talk about legacy. (ok you should realize by the now the feat is really nothing stupendous, but since this is my blog allow me to feel deluded a bit )
(Here's the link. Please read the footnote)
http://home.astronomy.com.ph/?id=/200601/columns/editorial
Actually the Mnemonic device might not have its enduring quality. The young ones would no longer recognize who the hell Gabby Concepcion is.
Ancient Showbiz 101 for the young ones and the feeling young ones with feigned amnesia. Gabs and Shawie were the Juday and Piolo, or Bea and Lloyd or Uma and Sam (hehe peace Uma fans) of the 80’s.
Gabby Concepcion became my father-in-law (at least in my own parallel universe) when a lovely lady emerged like an Immaculate Venus from a pool of water (or was that a pool of pH care? – I couldn’t bear to associate KC soaked and cleansed in a pool of feminine wash…. you do the analogy)
At any rate folks, do remember the mnemonic device. It might come in handy especially if you know where to spot the constellations. Knowing the names and their locations would definitely give gazillion pogi points during a stroll under the night sky with your hot date. Just don’t lose your cool like I did last time
Gorgeous gal : ( after being told the names of the stars she’d been pointing) Wow, Jodl
you know your stars pretty well (with twinkling eyes)
Me: Yeah… Actually You know what ? You remind me of the stars..
GG: Really and why is that?…(purring)
Me: Er…. Well …Uhm… ( Darn, notice how you forget the lines you’ve memorized a thousand times during that crucial moment)
GG: Y--es? (eyes twinkling more rapidly this time)
Me: Er…You’re like a star, coz.. er…..um…you’re a heavenly body, light years away , flaming like one big ball of hot gases… (Arrgh , it was not supposed to go like that..)
GG: (after a moment of stunned disbelief) Moron !
Happy stargazing !
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